Taking Out the Trash Day
Having my sleep interrupted by a couple of yahoos, I was obliged to go and have lunch at the local cafe, the Hot Poppy. My previous 'local' - the Peppermint, a lovely, comfotable coffee joint, run by a couple of friendly lesbians, was crumbling away and deemed "unfit for human occupation" by the council so second best would have to do. Most people tend to be disgusted when you tell them 12 o'clock is an early morning for you, but then again, 'most people' do not spend enough time arguing with foreigners at four a.m. that one does not shoot back or have two shots on the black.
'When was the last time you checked your e-mail' (Jenkins)
'er....a while ago.' (me)
'Don't bother.' (Wal)
It wasn't too bad in the end. Courtesy of Messers Tangen, Jenkins, McCurry and Miss Smith the sum total was: Glenn McGrath tell Lara to fuck off, stupid people ask stupid questions to Aussies, nude sumo wrestlers (mmm..yeah), Women's classifieds, recycling nagging... wives and the real-life Beavis and Buttheads break IN to women's prison to try to score with chicks. Oh, and Gerard sticks metal things into his face.
My life? I sent an SMS to one of my co-workers - the lovely Miss Belinda George. For those of you unaware of my attention span - I start off by saying something like; 'Let's catch up for lunch' but by the end of the message it involves edible lingerie. I don't know - that's why I try to keep my phonecalls short. Anyway, I send the message, fully forgetting that she has lent that phone to her father, who will be extremely curious to find out why one of his daughter's colleagues would like to see him in edible lingerie.
My adopted cousin, Jesse, with whom I have a Tom Cats-esque bet to see who gets married last (incidentally I am spending the $10, 000 already) wants me to catch up with tommorrow him before he goes back to Camberra. I also have the option of playing poker with a couple of Norwegian girls.
Oh, and in the time I took to come back from lunch (thanks boys), go upstairs to the dunnies and come back down again, my housemates tell me they are all thinking about moving house. Total time elapsed- eight minutes 23. D'oh. Homeless again. Until next time friends.
Don't be a fool. Stay in School.
Van Fatman, party liason