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Saturday, October 29, 2005


November was supposed to be a celebration of the hirsute. The annual growing of the moustache....MOVEMBER. The deal is everyone shaves their face on October 31 and try to grow their bestest moustache by the end of November. Simple, non? One month for everyone to be like the heroes of the moustache world like Albert Einstein, Salvador Dali, Australian cricketing greats- tubby guys like David Boone and Merv Hughes, Magnum P.I. and Groucho Marx ( yes, his was fake, no, I don't care) or their favorite 'tached villain. Adolph Hitler's cheeky pencil number, the webbed-toed Joseph Stalin's or even Fu Manchu's pointy mo.

In some countries it's also Fro-vember.

But alas, it won't be the case this year. There are two weddings to go to this year in November- Clark and Hayley's and Brad and Nez's- and since the weddings are going to be mid-November our moustaches will be at that weird halfway point where it will be that malformed, strange tufts of facial hair growing from the school lunch lady-stage and not fit for human viewing. So instead of risking being ripped to shreds by a murder of shrieking bridesmaids who will insist we grew them for the sole purpose of wrecking the wedding photos instead of the manly reason of winning a drunken bet we shall remain relatively clean shaven. Dammit.

November also hails the start of NaNoWriMo, the National November Writing month, where you're supposed to write a 50,000 word mini-novella. Although I won't officially participate due to my limited language skills and bad grammar, I shall attempt to write a book that starts off fairly normal but ends up as a full-blown zombie invasion ( Because literature that does not contain the undead confuses me). The Working title is ' Slow Rot Boogie' but that is subject to change.

I'm so cool, I have beard on my hands,


Blogger Hamish said...

That's too bad about Movember, it's an amazing idea. Maybe you can still participate by writing about an army of moustached zombies that kill people with those tiny moustache combs.

11:04 pm  
Blogger Ash Karreau said...

You should call your book "Dance of the Deadites: Slow Rot Boogie" instead. If you do, I get co-writer credit.

3:46 am  
Blogger Fatman said...

Hamish- Well, nothing instills more fear than the wandering dead that comprises of barbershop quartets and zombie Freddie Mercury Impersonators. I'm pretty sure the book would be the first of it's kind.

Ash- Anything that has an Evil Dead reference is automatically 30% cooler in my books. And considering I actually prefer reading your stuff than mine I'd be happy to oblige that co-writer deal.

p.s. Could you actually write it for me? I'm still stuck on three words leaving 49,997 still left to write. Writing sucks.

1:42 pm  

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