Groundhog Day and I'm Feeling Repetitive
It's Groundhog day today. Tradition has it that if Bill Murray sees his own shadow there will be six more weeks of having that dream where you're making slide projections for a biscuit company and you suddenly discover you're not wearing any pants. Although it's more a tradition observed in the Americas, where people listen to ground-dwelling rodents about the state of the weather rather than high-tech satellite equipment, it's given me time to dwell on the repetitive nature on my life thus far.
Apart from starting to learn Russian this Saturday for my upcoming Trans-Siberian trip things have been a tad monotonous of late. Having a quick scan of my last dozen or so posts I see that my musings have a well worn groove- it is following a John Grisham-esque formulaic routine. This tends to be because I lurch at the computer every 3-4 days to write not because I have anything particularly interesting to say but because if I don't I'll forget how to do basic stuff like linking and turning on the computer without setting it on fire.
How I Approach Blogs:
1. Take pills to stop the inanimate objects talking to me and making me do weird things.
2. Turn on computer.
3. Put out fire that has somehow started on the computer.
4. Gaze at screen for half an hour.
5. Check emails.
6. Go back to "writing"
7. Think of what happened the last time I went drinking. Embellish.
8. Write venomously how only three people every read me, one of them being my mother (this is something I think everyone does at least once in their blogging career. It's almost a must. Anytime anyone deviates from the number of people reading (3) or the family member reading it (Mum) the humour seems to be less effective. If you bitch about how the only people read your blog is 14 guys and an estranged uncle it seems less funny. 43% less funny in fact based on a number I just pulled out of the air)
9. Link to Wikipedia a few random words just for the sake of it.
10. Remember a funny t-shirt that you saw someone wear (i.e. 'I f-cked the Olsen twins before they were famous') and put that in the post somewhere to claim as your own.
(NEW!)
11. Add a jpeg of said comment.
Mary-Kate and Ashley today
Fin
I think maybe I should stop taking the prescribed pills. Maybe the inanimate objects have something important to say.
Wondering what penguins taste like,
Fatman
Apart from starting to learn Russian this Saturday for my upcoming Trans-Siberian trip things have been a tad monotonous of late. Having a quick scan of my last dozen or so posts I see that my musings have a well worn groove- it is following a John Grisham-esque formulaic routine. This tends to be because I lurch at the computer every 3-4 days to write not because I have anything particularly interesting to say but because if I don't I'll forget how to do basic stuff like linking and turning on the computer without setting it on fire.
How I Approach Blogs:
1. Take pills to stop the inanimate objects talking to me and making me do weird things.
2. Turn on computer.
3. Put out fire that has somehow started on the computer.
4. Gaze at screen for half an hour.
5. Check emails.
6. Go back to "writing"
7. Think of what happened the last time I went drinking. Embellish.
8. Write venomously how only three people every read me, one of them being my mother (this is something I think everyone does at least once in their blogging career. It's almost a must. Anytime anyone deviates from the number of people reading (3) or the family member reading it (Mum) the humour seems to be less effective. If you bitch about how the only people read your blog is 14 guys and an estranged uncle it seems less funny. 43% less funny in fact based on a number I just pulled out of the air)
9. Link to Wikipedia a few random words just for the sake of it.
10. Remember a funny t-shirt that you saw someone wear (i.e. 'I f-cked the Olsen twins before they were famous') and put that in the post somewhere to claim as your own.
(NEW!)
11. Add a jpeg of said comment.
Mary-Kate and Ashley todayFin
I think maybe I should stop taking the prescribed pills. Maybe the inanimate objects have something important to say.
Wondering what penguins taste like,
Fatman
posted by Fatman | 1:50 pm
6 Comments:
dude ur blog is awesome......those girls are HOTTTTT
Penguins taste like chicken. Not unlike the twins above.
Hamish- Thanks for the compliment but the subject sort of wrote itself.
Skar- Been trying to catch me a penguin for a while but they waddle away too quickly. Dang varmints!
Also- Does anyone actually know who the jpeg of the twins actually are? I'll give a chicken mcnugget to the first person who can get it right.
They go by the name of
Prussian Blue.
Ding ding ding! There's a chicken mcnugget on the way to Wyoming Skar.
(To find out what the Heck we're talking about check out Drunken Goat Bukkake- one of the funniest site names in History)Star- have decided to invest the money for the chicken mcnugget in other worthwhile causes. The Wyoming cattle need not worry....for now.
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